We women are at an all time high risk of getting burned out. Why? Because so many of us tend to practice trying to be super women, the ones who can “do it all.”
Naturally we are care-givers and nurturers and our tendency is to give all we have. We think we can do it all. We think we “should” do it all. And many of us find our self worth in what we can accomplish, perfect and complete…. in whether we can make everything flow like clockwork for our families, our-co-workers, our friends and ourselves. BUT this often comes at a cost - our own vitality and well being.
When you DO so much in your life, you ultimately get massively depleted. As a result, you lose yourself, your passion, enthusiasm …. Your “joie de vivre”.
We need to have a rest revolution. A complete re-haul of the way that we do our lives so that we understand the value of replenishing ourselves. When we feel good, life feels more manageable and our inner light is burning brightly.
What might a more restful life practice look like?
Boundaried bedtimes and wake up times
Getting enough sleep.
Less multi-tasking. (like eating and driving)
More sitting on the couch with nothing in your hand. The practice of being.
Yoga Nidra (deep relaxation practice)
Time away from “it all.” Retreat time.
Put the phone down. More often. Turn off screens by 8pm.
Do you feel all the internal voices arising saying that’s impossible or I don’t want to do that? I do see your point. I wrestle with it too. Changing our priorities and the way that we do our lives is definitely not easy and it takes awareness and commitment to make it happen.
Here are the obstacles that arise when I suggest more rest to my clients:
There’s no time to rest or get to bed earlier.
There’s no way I could change how my days are set up.
I HAVE TOO MUCH TO DO.
I have too many obligations to others. ex: what would my husband think if I didn’t spend that time with him…. Is it okay if I go to sleep before my teenagers?
It’s just not what I want to do. (the inner brat).
Rest is hard for me. I can’t get quiet. My mind is always racing.
And then I bring the client back to her symptoms. She is feeling empty, depleted, dull and a lack of luster for life. She is wondering what the point of all this is. Life might be feeling hard. She may be having other symptoms like hot flashes, fatigue, sleeplessness, anxiety or more.
We have to remember our WHY. Why is it that we need to replenish? So that we become realigned with our natural rhythms.
Stress, disorder, dis-ease and loss of meaning are NOT our natural rhythms.
Connection, spaciousness, presence, balance, self-regulation, perspective and clarity ARE the natural rhythms of a healthy being.
Once we know WHY we need to change - (because we want to FEEL better, happier, more joyous, less moody, less fatigued…. ) then comes the issue of making the change. It really can be a thing - to unravel our current way of doing things. It takes awareness, self reflection and a true desire to put our own well-being at the top of our priority list. Are you ready? Do you see why this could be so beneficial?
As a last note I would also say that it takes time and commitment to truly make the change. Don’t get disheartened when you begin to work with this. You are up against your habits, your programming of do, do, do and the idea that what you accomplish is attached to your sense of self worth. Let that sink in.
It is going to take self-compassion, time, self-awareness and a commitment to unraveling this.
Knowing this, let yourself be in the imperfect space of figuring it out, adjusting, going off course and adjusting again. Remember the end goal is that you FEEL better.
If you want to learn more about how to reframe your current habits and to implement a more restful way of being without letting everything else in your life fall apart, learn about our coaching here. Or, come on retreat with us to Tulum where practicing rest and replenishment will be a big part of what we do.